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The Just Give Up Campaign

Hey, are you ambitious? Creative? Self fulfilled in your passion? Well, now’s the time to turn that around and just give the fuck up. That’s right, everyone else has started, and now you can too! Jump on the bandwagon and give up today! If you’re happy with what you do in life, if you find yourself absolutely in love or if you think your social life couldn’t be any better, then this is the time. Dump your friends, chase off that lover and quit your job to become a stay at home nobody, and you will finally achieve true happiness! Millions across the country are already giving up, so what’s your fuckin’ problem? You too good to give up? Huh? That it? You pretentious fuck. Just quit. Just stop it. Stop all of it. Give. Up. Today.

Ask anyone who’s already been taken in by our campaign; nothing matters! Your achievements, your accomplishments, they’re meaningless! In a hundred years, a thousand years, a million years…shit, who knows, nobody will remember the things you were once so proud of. In fact, the sun will go out and everyone will die, so it’s truly pointless in the most profound sense possible. Give up today and begin leading a more rewarding life instantly! Once you accept this one tiny fact, we guarantee you will see the world more clearly, free of the bullshit they’d peddled down your throat for years about self fulfillment and realization. You’ll gain new purpose, you’ll try to help others see it too, and finally feel like you’re really accomplishing something.

For a one, low time price of 19.99, we can teach you how to stop giving a shit so that you’ll finally appreciate life for the boring, meandering, endlessly miserable poorly thought out and overpriced novelty gift that it is. Do you sometimes feel like you could do less? Like you were meant for something worse? Then giving up is probably the right course of action for you. Join us. Fucking give up today.

Trust us, you’ll probably regret it.

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“You Ruined Everything”: A Novel By Me

Hey, want to help me avoid ever having a job outside of my house? Then this is the blog post for you! About two years ago, I started writing something, and about a year ago, I finished writing it. I didn’t know at the time that it would become my first full length novel. Since it’s been finished, I’ve also written about six other novels. I’ve been a busy bitch, is what I’m trying to say. So, this first novel is about to be self published, and now is your chance to help me avoid ever having a real job! I’ve written short stories, screenplays, even novellas in the past, but this is my first full novel, ranging in at a little over 50k words. It’s also the shortest novel that I’ve written, probably because it was my first. So buckle up, ’cause here we go.

“You Ruined Everything” is about a young woman named Fern Walters. She’s in her late twenties, a famous botanist and comes from an upper crust family. Despite doing well for herself, one night in a drunken rage she burns down her childhood home. Soon, she finds herself entangled with her estranged mother June, a young bubbly activist named Shiloh who admires her and a witty bartender named Henry she’s let herself fall for. It’s a story about family, forgiveness, anger, abuse, trauma and above all, accepting that not everything in life is going to turn out ok, and that that itself IS OK.

The book is currently in a print limbo, because I’m not sure how many people want to buy a copy, and because self publishing real physical books can be quite pricey, I haven’t really set about sending it off yet. So, here’s the deal. If more than 10 people respond and say they want to buy a copy, then I will make 10 copies. If not, you can still purchase the epub version. Because of this, the cost has not yet been set, but there will also be layers. You can purchase the book at a set price, or you can pay a bit extra and get a signed copy, along with a magnet pertaining to the book. I’m gonna be honest. I’m not trying to be generous with these ‘extra bits’. I’m selling you a product, with more bells and whistles. I’m not going to lie to you, ’cause we’re friends.

So, there we have it. If you’re interested in this, either comment on this post or e-mail me at coyotefuglyblog@gmail.com and I will respond when I have all the information. So that’s that, guys. Please, seriously, help me avoid ever leaving my house. I’m not built for the real world. Thank you, and thank you all for reading my blog.

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So Here We Are Again

Well, I guess it’s a new year.

Not that I really think there’s any difference between one year or another, but let’s not get into my acidic vitriolic hate for pointless holidays. That’s another blog post for another time. Right now I guess I just wanted to say that it’s a new year and nothing is different. People approach the new year with this sense of invigoration. This sense of ‘I’m going to conquer the world’ and they come up with a list of shit they could honestly have done at any point in time, last year, this coming year or 5 years from now, as achievements mean nothing in the frame of time, and they think this year…this will be the year it all gets better.

I don’t want to shit on anyone’s hamburger, but it doesn’t. I’m sick. I’m mentally challenged. Guess what. Those things don’t go away over time. Even if my ‘resolution’ was to do better this year, in terms of being sick or mentally challenged, come January 1st 2018, I’d still be sick and mentally challenged. Not saying it’s pointless to try and better ones self, and I’m not necessarily sold on the whole ‘accept yourself as you are’ belief system either. I don’t really know where I stand, honestly. I just know that I’m sick, and now I’m sick of this.

With this in mind, I think the argument I’m trying to make is don’t wait until some arbitrary day to suddenly decide to get your shit together or better something. Try every single day. I fight with myself, about myself, every single day. It’s tiring, it’s exhausting, it’s frustrating but I’m not going to turn my progress into a game of some kind, give myself a deadline of some sort, to get better. And just to be clear, I’m not putting down people who do this sort of thing. I’m just saying I’m not one of those people. I’m going to work on myself at all times, 365 days, 24/7. Especially since there’s no end to getting better. I’ll never reach a moment when I look in the mirror and go, “You know what, I think that’s good enough. I think I’m not autistic anymore. I think I’ll be ok. I’m no longer mentally ill. Let’s go shopping now.”

That doesn’t happen. There’s no end to betterment. There’s no peak. Climbing a mountain, reading a book, shooting a film. These have endings. These have a finite point where you stop and it’s over and you move onto the next thing. Mental health doesn’t work that way. You don’t stop being sick. You’re always going to be sick. You just keep learning how to work within the confines of your illness, forever, every year, resolutions be damned.

TLDR; fuck new years, better yourself forever.